What’s behind those lines of laughter
in the night
the quiet when no one is around to watch
Who is the watcher now?
I no longer heard the wind
only the flow of phrases running through my mind
Course of confusion disabled
I am saddened by the hatred greed and anger
the way a man fights to protect what he thinks is truth
I laugh and play when I am with little children
the lines swirl on my face
dancing with pure joy
Yet deep inside when all excitement passing
the tears come again
and I cannot find an answer
cannot see beauty
lost the dance
tears of a clown
Robin Williams committed suicide this morning. A comedy legend, he suffered from depression. That seems to be an oxymoron and at the same time an incredibly profound statement about people and the duality that goes on in their minds. No one can hear the internal dialogue that nags a soul.
“You are living in this world as one individual, but before you take the form of a human being, you are already there, always there. We are always here. Do you understand? You think before you were born you were not here. But how is it possible for you to appear in this world, when there is no you? Because you are already there, you can appear in the world. Also, it is not possible for something to vanish which does not exist. Because something is there, something can vanish. You may think that when you die, you disappear, you no longer exist. But even though you vanish, something which is existent cannot be non-existent. That is the magic. We ourselves cannot put any magic spells on this world. The world is its own magic. If we are looking at something, it can vanish from our sight, but if we do not try to see it, that something cannot vanish. Because you are watching it, it can disappear, but if no one is watching, how is it possible for anything to disappear? If someone is watching you, you can escape from him, but if no one is watching, you cannot escape from yourself.” excerpt from Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind, Shunryu Suzuki.
It is easy to get bogged down.